About Me

“Jen-Centric”

My screen names and blog titles tell a lot about myself.
Last year I was one of the many LOST fanatics who lived, breathed, and dreamed about LOST. That’s where the title Jen-Centric comes from. Every LOST episode “centered” around a different character. My life and therefore my blogs center around me so…..Jen-Centric.
I am learning to focus on my strengths not weaknesses as per some very good podcast ADDvice. I KNOW that I believe greatly in the power of oneself. I believe that being the best ME is the best gift I can give my friends and family. My beliefs about God even come down to; his greatest gift to us is our freedom to choose right from wrong and to choose what to believe and not believe. I just bought Tom Rath’s Strengthsfinder 2.0 and I am very eager to officially find out what my strengths are. Since I am very intuitive, sympathetic, and empathetic I have a feeling many of my strengths will reside in this area. I can’t wait to see if my intuition is correct.
The other screen name I go by is Mom2Lindsey. The screen name is self- explanatory. Being a mom to Lindsey is the biggest redesign of self image in my almost 40 years of age. For the first 6 years of Lindsey, I am pretty sure Jen-Centric was no where to be found. I was 24/7 Mom2Lindsey. I am realizing that another one of my ADD strengths is my ability to hyperfocus and become completely devoted to one thing at a time. Hyper-focusing on your kids is also very normal and socially acceptable. Unfortunately, there is a downside to every ADD strength and the downside to this strength is that I ignore everything that is not involved in what I am hyper-focusing on. During Lindsey’s first 6 years I completely ignored my personal health and well-being in order to be supermom and do everything perfect (how did that work out?). When my daughter went off to Kindergarten in 2009 I was shocked at how unraveled I became. My entire mind, body and soul had had enough, and was screaming for me to pay attention. I had to stop pretending to be perfect and just be myself again.
Being almost 40 I am in the midst of another self-image makeover. I am trying to find the balance between taking care of myself and being the best mom/wife I can be. I have separated the two for the the beginning of Lindsey’s life, which wasn’t right. I can really identify with all those magnets and bumper stickers that say “balanced mom”. Maybe that should be my new screen name; balancedmom40…..

Happy New Year

Looking back at 2011
What were my successes?
I welcomed a new member to my family. Dexter, a wheaten terrier puppy. I learned a lot about raising him and took a class to teach him the necessities. I also learned patience and to love him.
I sent Lindsey to a summer camp that really helped her grow in confidence and gave her a new best friend and a lot of fun trips.
I went to the top of the empire state building with the two people I love most.
Brought my girl to see my favorite musical Wicked. We sat up close orchestra level.
I brightened a Veteran’s day with some cookies.
I made an impact on parents and staff of L’s elementary school and made them money by heading the book fair committee.
I continued to nurture good friendships.
I took my parents to Disneyworld for the first time in their lives.
I threw my daughter a fabulous mock-sleepover party for her 7th birthday.
I flew in a tethered hot-air balloon and made a date to fly in a real one.
I took my daughter to Washington DC.
I went to the Renaissance Faire for the first time.
I learned how to camp and slept outside in 30 degree temps.
Drove Lindsey in to NYC for the first time in my life.
I learned a lot about ADHD and I made a goal for myself to educate others.
I finally got my teaching license requirements in order.
I reconciled with my father’s family, especially my cousin.

Summer Camp

Lindsey is enjoying her 3rd summer camp field trip today @Space Odyssey. Yesterday her group baked oatmeal coconut cookies that were delicious.

Camp Excel 

I want Lindsey to have this kind of specialized education and attention all the time. Ratio 3 to 1. Of course we paid for it, but give me my school taxes back and let me pay for where I want her to go. Let me choose-isn't that what freedom is?

Post-Puppy Depression

Why is it when you hit "middle-age" does every problem have; disorder, syndrome, or depression added to it?

I had my first and only baby when I was 33. Older than many moms I've met with children my daughter's age. All of a sudden my world is a cyclone twisting wildly with every change my daughter goes through. She was born in 2004 and since then I've had the common postpartum depression, and a wide-variety of other issues with disorder or syndrome attached. Could there be a Post-Puppy depression too? Why not?
Although not in medical journals post-puppy depression apparently exists. Of course it is exactly like postpartum depression except you can lock the puppy in a crate and go away. No sleep, lots of poop and pee to clean, teething toys, round the clock feedings and trips to the potty. It's kind of like having a toddler & infant wrapped into one.

OH BUT HE's CUTE.....Yes, the saving grace of every puppy and baby, their cuteness. Every time I look at him I say to myself....just give it time you'll love him as much as you do Dusty (my first fur baby). I'm still sitting here though, wondering why I wrecked my perfectly lazy, lonely, summer by getting a puppy!
Why? Ahhhh yes, that wildly twisting cyclone of a daughter of mine. Lindsey, who I would give my life for and apparently my lazy summers too. Lindsey and this puppy Dexter have bonded already. She loves him so much. Lindsey's happiness and need to have a puppy to grow up with is indeed the reason we got this puppy. Once again my world has been changed for the better, I'm sure. Can what I'm feeling be called post-puppy depression? Who really knows? Just another twist in my life to ride out.

My Love of Journaling

Journaling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Journaling has always been cathartic for me. I usually pick up the journal in times of emotional crisis as a form of therapy. I have four that I’ve written in. They span from the early nineties to last night. I only manage to write on a quarter to half of the pages though. It has always bothered me that I’ve never been able to finish a whole journal. I was re-reading my most recent journal last night. I came to the realization as I difficultly read about two of the most traumatic times of my life. Once these events are survived I want to put them away and not confront them anymore. It was very hard to read about them last night, but there were some fun moments too. My intention has always been to finish a journal once I started one, so interspersed between my cathartic ramblings I tried to include some happy memories and five things I’m thankful for entries. My enthusiasm for journaling waxes and wanes like the moon, I’ve gone YEARS in between entries. The largest gap has been 6 years…..How old is my daughter? Almost 6.  How could I not journal about her? I did, in her baby books, scrapbooks and now a school journal and boxes full of her memories from the year. I even just bought her first journal. So far I haven’t seen a budding Shakespeare emerge; as a matter of fact I think the journal is under the seat in our car!

Since I use journaling as a form of therapy, the gaps in entries can only mean I have been pretty happy and secure in my life. That’s a good thing!

As I’m wondering why someone like me, with no writing background decided to write a blog, all I have to do is look around at all of the baby books, journals, Christmas memory journal, vacation photo journals and scrapbooks with journaling all throughout. I am a WRITER! At very least writing and recording memories has always been a passion and something that brings me joy. Lest I forget my college degree was earned by writing a lot of papers on various works of literature and educational theories.

The reason journaling became my first real blog is because I wanted to write about our upcoming cruise on May 27. In my tour through my purple journal last night I reminisced about 3 previous cruises I went on. I just got carried away with my history of journaling.

I absolutely love cruising. Cruising will be my next blog.